On 20160408 at 10.50pm I felt abdominal pain. Then, at 10.55pm I passed motion, a lot. Considering I often surfer from constipation in this pregnancy and had passed motion this morning, today seems to be a big clean out day.
My stomach ache persisted until 11.10pm and I realized I then had a diarrhoea. What happened ? It seems that my large intestine has undergone a spring cleaning, perhaps it is good to declutter all waste materials that have piled there due to constipation.
Although I had no more to excrete, my stomach pain persisted at much milder rate. But before that, it was very painful, but I ended up praying and saying affirmations like the followings:
My body knows how to remove things that are harmful for baby and me.
My body knows how to remove things that are not useful to me.
My butt knows how to pass motions without hurting it and causing any haemorrhage.
It was a painful 15 minutes, and gave me a little confidence  that perhaps I can stand labour pain. My mother once shared that labour pain is like 10x of stomach ache when we have diarrhoea. That’s beyond my imagination .
I have never experienced contraction until the day and hour of scheduled C-section came. If I had a time machine, I may want to consider requesting more days for Little Prince to be ready, regardless of his increasing weight. Until today, Little Prince has often suffered from breathing difficulty and the paediatrician has recognized him well as a regular customer.
Once, at age 3, Little Prince knew how severe his breathing problem and requested to see a doctor. Since Honey Panda and I were overseas, my parents-in-law rushed him to the largest hospital and he was under an observation.
 The confidence
The ability to endure the 150-minute pain gave me a hope, especially after Honey Panda refused to read or learn about VBAC. At least, I was able to deal with my pain by seeking positive avenues e.g. praying, positive affirmations, holding my hands in a praying gesture, and being patient.
I was afraid of height, and now I am still afraid of height, hence we chose in 20th-floor flat without a balcony. Once, I decided to feel my fear, and go to skydiving anyway. Of course, I do the skydiving with an instructor. Most importantly, the experience taught me that we can find courage and confidence from inside us.
 Women are naturally designed to give birth.
Although from the date knowing that I am pregnant, I intuitively think that our baby is a girl and the preliminary ultrasound done a week ago (I’m now in week 17 of gestational age) did not reveal any male reproductive organ between baby’s legs, at the moment of diarrhoea-associated abdominal pain, I hope that baby is a boy so that he would not have to endure pains associated with child birth.
Well, most time, I hope to have a baby girl because we have a Little Prince and I don’t want to be outnumbered by three men at home. When I mentioned how cute a little (perhaps toddler) girl in a traditional dress, Honey Panda remarked that I want a doll to be dressed up and loved. Yes, I was a doll for my parents, my father dictated how my hair was to be tied, he used to love 2 tails on the side and my mother would put some accessories on it. A photo showed that I held the ribbon on both my pony tails when they took a photo of me by a pond (I was worried the ribbon would fall into water, silly!)
 The empathy
While I was in pain, sitting on the toilet seat, I thought of a girlfriend [3a] who suffered from diarrhoea while on a train from Hanoi to Lào Cai, in Vietnam in 2007. At that time, seeing her face blushing red in pain, I I could only try to look for an empty plastic bag. I made a mental note to myself, to bring more tissue, wet wipes, and plastic bags. Include them as essentials in our travel checklist. Plastic bags are useful to store snacks, dirty clothes, pukes, and shits.
Suddenly, in my moment of pain, I felt her pain. It seems that human beings can only be empathetic once they experience similar encounters. It is hard for a single boss to imagine the workload of a married subordinate who needs to tend to little children. It is not easy for a man to imagine the pain associated with pregnancy and child birth.
[3a] We became friends during the trip, as I did not know her before, but we did not manage to keep in touch much as I moved to overseas few months later. I tried to look for her on facebook. I was unsuccessful but instead I found a beautiful Hong Kong lady (see 20160409*meinv*) who graduated in Economy from Cambridge University in 2014. She seems to love her mother very much and I immediately like her, hopefully our baby girl will grow up kind, loving, smart and beautiful like Sabrina.
 Food adventure
We were invited to a Burmese lunch and since we love Asian cuisine, we ate a lot. My rationale is that we should appreciate diverse food as a gesture of gratitude to our mother earth for providing resources to nourish our body. How do you know what is good for our body and health?
Perhaps, I should resist myself from trying new food (I was concerned with the flies that were flying around, and had tried to chose hot food) and be less adventurous since my immune system is weakened during pregnancy. I started with allergy after lunch, I felt that my hands and legs are itchy on the taxi back home. Then, reaching home, I vomited. At night, I started to have multiple diarrhoea .
 Multiple diarrhoea
Alas, my diarrhoea continued to 20160409.
12.45am: I had a diarrhoea again, and it’s a lot.
01.45am: I woke up due to diarrhoea-associated stomach ache, but I passed only a drop. I drank honey water to replace lost liquid.
02.35am: I had a stomach ache again that woke me up and I had a diarrhoea again.
5.55am: my stomach ache came again and it woke me up, I ended up with a diarrhoea again and called the hospital in breathless way as I felt weak. The staff told me to return at 9 am if my diarrhoea did not stop. I took photos in case I need to show them to my care provider(s), perhaps not. After ~ 50 minutes at the toilet, I went back to sleep.
4.50pm: I had a diarrhoea again, removing the precious late (due to my disrupted sleep) lunch that we had at ~ 3pm.
It was my last diarrhoea, thankfully.
However, I had a constipation that lasted until 20160413 11pm plus. I have been trying to pass motion for days but I dare not to push too hard as I am worried it may cause hemorrhoids/piles and contraction (as I have a short cervix).
I was very grateful that for being able to pass motion after my episodes of diarrhoea ended. Before the first few faeces were released, I kept on praying to God to help my body to release everything that is not useful and is harmful to my baby and my body. Prayers work, hence I believe that we must constantly pray (with perseverance!) and hope for everything good (even if one does not believe in any particular religion) for oneself and others.
Returning to my question, how do we know what is good for our body and health? Honestly, I am still searching. One thing I know that has worked (at least for me) is to have a positive mindset. Think positively. However, it’s not enough, we must take actions, do our homework, educate ourselves. Thus, I started to learn about pregnancy and childbirth. I started creating notes (the archive is here) that I can share with Honey Panda so that we can be in harmony in decision making regarding the 2016 pregnancy, the labour, etc.